Joseph Longhany
Stuart Greene
(Your Choice of 2 Student Example Papers)
Part 1
Read the Article I wrote about academic arguments, and pick two of the student example papers. Analyze and compare the extent to which each example paper succeeds in presenting a research conversation, indicating a gap, and contributing to the conversation.
Part 2
Consider Stuart Greene's criteria for developing open-ended questions, and locate the research questions posed in the example papers you chose. To what degree do the questions presented meet the criteria Greene lays out? Re-write the open ended question(s) and manipulate the framing of the questions. (to see examples of re-framing questions, visit the course home page, and read my example questions).
Part 3
Consider the problem that one of the example papers explores, and develop an alternate means of primary research to address the question. Primary research is the research that the writer herself did. For example, I am currently exploring pathways to improve legal writing, and I am doing some primary research in a few weeks. I am meeting with six law students in a focus group. The goal is to understand how their first year of law school went and what they learned about legal writing.
Primary research often consists of interviews, surveys, textual analysis, observations, and experiments. Every student example paper linked up to our course uses some form of primary research.
The goal for part three is for you to develop an alternate means to address the research question presented. Give enough detail to explain how your alternative primary research approach would work.
*NOTE: Blogger is fickle in terms of browser compatibility. Make sure you use Google Chrome when posting to Blogger. Also, log into your Google account in a separate tab, and then post to the board.
I recommend that you write your responses in word and save them. Then, copy and paste your content to the blog. This way, if something goes awry, you have a saved copy of your posting.
If you have any questions, text me at 407-222-2558 or email me at Joseph.Longhany@ucf.edu
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteSurvey screenshot link: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1rRbIdMVxVHWIkpgBXROoK0QvjYzKCWyVvpN-5RXdBJQ/edit?usp=sharing
ReplyDeleteTo begin with, I chose student papers four and five to talk about. While both papers were rather entertaining to read it is evident how one paper did better than the other in some regard. With respect to presenting a research conversation both papers did excellent. Paper four wrote about internet piracy and provided both sides of the argument, those for anti-piracy legislation as well as the opponent side that desires legislation that will not inhibit the rights and freedoms of internet users. Paper five presented rhetoric on college football recruitment, focusing on what entices player to choose a specific school. He also provided background research that stated the correlation between good recruiting and good football teams. Both papers were also able to indicate a gap in their respective research conversations. Paper four brought forth the notion that while both the SOPA and PIPA legislation were shot down because of the large spotlight that was placed on them, ACTA went by relatively unnoticed and presented a larger risk due to the fact that it would be an international law that would limit internet users. As for paper five he realized not much research has gone into what specific things draw in players to choose a certain university over others. The actual contribution the papers put forth is where I see a difference between them. While paper five reveals that he went ahead and did a survey which although small still yielded pertinent information, paper four however seems to have just analyzed and wrote about research he conducted not actually contributing by interviewing, surveying, or what ever have you.
Both paper’s questions were fairly good at meeting Greene’s criteria. Paper four’s research question is whether the cost is to great in combating internet piracy. Paper five’s question is what works in the college recruiting process? Paper four was able to answer the question with the tools at hand by stating how internet piracy should be left alone and unregulated so that it may fix itself as the internet is growing and the small impact piracy has is not worth intervention. Paper four answered it through means of a survey and individual interviews with fellow football players, coming to the conclusion that the best recruitment strategy is to have a coach that builds relationships with the players. Both papers also meet the criteria of conveying who they are answering the question for. Paper four answers the question for internet users in general, and paper five answers it for college football fans and coaches. Lastly, they both meet the third criteria that states that it should be organized around an issue. Paper four centers around piracy, and paper five focuses on college football recruitment.
An alternative means of primary research that could have been conducted by paper four could be just taking a general survey of a diverse group of people and having them state their view on whether they believe intervention with legislation is required in regards to internet piracy or not.
Survey
ReplyDeletehttps://docs.google.com/document/d/1bey1AmgB3wqBH0kUKuqEHwHsvlP5zyAhr13e0r5LeS4/edit
Tiffany Gagnon, writer of Student paper 3: “The Disinhibition of Reddit Users”, dose a fine job at explaining the topic at hand, which in her case was disinhibition and its place on Reddit. But when it came introducing the research conversation I feel that Corrin Pinkney, the writer of Student paper 1: “The Effects of Internalized Oppression on the Black Community”, was more effective in doing so due to her pre-lude paragraph. Not only did she effectively introduce the research conversation she also was able to give foresight into how she intended to add to the conversation. Tiffany, I felt, on the other hand jumped straight the topic without prelude and with the assumption that the readers where familiar with the internet and Reddit, which in her defense is not farfetched. She counterbalances this by using very precise/easy language to describe and explain her process and findings.
In terms of gap, both rhetors made their chosen gap apparent in the introduction and then later addressed it again in the conclusion.
Both of them obviously contribute to the conversation through the publishing of their work but the way each went about doing so was unique. What I mean by that is Tiffany took the topic and further condensed the focus on disinhibition in the Reddit discourse community. While Corrin intended to “continue the tradition” so to speak and see if she could confirm the opinions of past scholars, but actually found a current shift in the trend.
Both of the essays essential question met the requirements of Geene “The Disinhibition of Reddit Users” posed the question of what effect dose disinhibition have on Reddit users. “The Effects of Internalized Oppression on the Black Community” again speaks for its self on the question being answered. Both questions are about relevant topics that people talk about and the answer to both of the can be found through the various primary approaches to research.
Their reframed questions would be something like “How will internalized oppression on the black community effect the future of America and “What future problems will stem from disinhibition”.
In student essay 1: “The Effects of Internalized Oppression on the Black Community” Corrin’s choice of primary methods where textual analysis of eight scholarly resources and interviewing black people (sample size not indicated) between the ages of 19 and 60. I felt that this approach was ideal for answering the question of how internalized oppression effects the black community. But another approach that I think would work and would use is analyzing pop culture, specifically on the representation and overall participation of darker skinned people compared to that of their light skinned counter parts.
The method of execution would be quite simple, I would look at famous models, actors, news cast, cartoons, and politicians and see if I saw any patterns or correlations in terms of peoples skin color. That would give insight in to the conversation because pop culture is reprehensive of what is accepted and popular in our current society.
Link to completed ENC1102 survey (I accidentally clicked “Done” but this is a screenshot showing that I have, indeed, already taken the survey) https://postimg.org/image/y8c0b3071/
ReplyDeleteAfter initially choosing both student example papers numbers 2 and 9, although drastically different approaches were taken, there are similarities in the styles that they set the framework of their research and how they set up the prior knowledge a reader must know before diving into the research each student did. Both papers started stating the situation at hand and gives a very broad sense of the direction their research is go into and then proceed to zero into the specific question they are choosing to answer. In essay 2, the student writer explains research made by those before her as to why previous generations seem to be targeting Gen Y, but she chooses to discuss on the gap of why this generation, prominently, has received more hate from elders as opposed to previous ones. However, in essay 9, the student writer also opened her essay with the very broad topic of influence of characteristics in children’s fairy tales and specifically shed light on the gap of gender inequality and the toll it can take on a child. Both student writers, though different in topic, generally contributed to the conversation in the same way, by basing research on themselves personally looking up either the characteristics of these fairy tale personas or the articles and newspapers written in previous generations.
Both student essays generally meet the criteria of Greene’s framework for a good question. However, the student who wrote essay number 2, could have rewrote the question to not make it “Why is this generation in particular so picked on by others?” but “What elements and factors played into Generation Y being so different that it is picked on by others?” This question leads to a more specific research goal as opposed to a general field of why Generation is different from the rest. The student who wrote essay number 9 seemed to have fit the criteria of Greene’s framework a little bit better. It did in fact convey a clear idea of who, what, why and how the question is being answered.
Another way primary research could have been performed differently for student essay number 9 is if the writer had children themselves review and write down the characteristics they notice from different genders in well-recognized fairy tales as opposed the writer herself. This particular writer could have even had children play different gender roles in quick plays of each fairy tale and notice how their confidence would rise or lower depending on which character they were asked to play.
The student writer in essay 2 could have interviewed the same amount of people in the same age ranges from different generations on how they were treated growing up as the newest generation and how they treat the upcoming youth.
I don't know how to screenshot the page so here's the link to the page that says I completed the survey, https://www.surveymonkey.com/survey-taken/?sm=vyrxDCeFlVixus_2BIajON7eWy8ui3v7CGiM_2F328UJor6_2F3uSfLUmRdVXOGASZQ0oraAd8ZWh7f_2FVwZBHeHpcGxA_3D_3D
ReplyDeleteI chose student papers 4 and 9, these papers were rather interesting to me. Paper 4 discussed the cost of combating internet piracy, this paper was interesting to me because both sides of the argument were presented which allowed me as the reader to have a full understanding of all sides of this issue and the research behind each side. Paper 9 discussed the effects of gender stereotyping in children’s literature, particularly Disney Princesses and, how each gender is portrayed differently can affect the children reading these fairy tales. Both papers do a fine job of identifying a gap, in paper 4 the author identified a gap between the legislation of internet piracy by shedding light on ACTA, which is an agreement among several countries to stop internet piracy however, due to SOPA and PIPA, which are other acts that attempted to do the same thing, being stopped because of the lack of freedom and free internet people would have access to, ACTA is “trying to slide by below the radar of the public eye”. How can something that is “sliding below public eye” be what is best for the people? In paper 9 the author identifies a gap in gender equality, the author discusses how people, women in particular, fought to close the gender gap back in the 60’s and 70’s, only for the gender gap to grow even further apart no thanks to children’s literature, making women either young and beautiful or old and ugly, making women who are uglier and older more powerful, or making younger women have magical powers that make them “non-human”, which makes it hard for young girls to relate to these stories and, making them think they need to be like these character to be accepted in society.
I feel that both papers followed Greene’s criteria well. Paper 4 presents the question, “Is Combating Internet Piracy to Great?”. Paper 9 presents the question, “Are the Disney Princess stories more than your average fairy tale?”. Both papers do a fine job of following Greene’s criteria, they both identified an issue (internet piracy, gender stereotypes), they identified the situation (combating internet piracy might cost too much, Disney fairy tales furthering the gender gap), and they framed good questions (Is the cost of combating internet piracy to great? Disney Princess tales are they more than just your average fairy tale?) They both provide ample research and evidence to answer these questions. I think if the author of paper 4 changed the question to “Is freedom worth cracking down on internet piracy?”, because this identifies one of the big costs to combat internet piracy, which could help readers understand why fighting internet piracy is so difficult before even reading much of the article.
I think that an alternate means of primary research for paper 9 could be, interviewing children who read a lot of children’s literature or Disney Princess literature, to get to know their thoughts on how each gender is portrayed differently and how that makes them feel. I feel interviewing children paired with the coding chart the author already created would make her research so much stronger.
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteI kept it simple and chose student papers 1 and 2 to do my analysis and comparison of academic articles. Student Paper 1 addresses the topic of racism between members of the black community while Student Paper 2 writes about the differences and problems with the youth of five generations. Both papers do a very good job of addressing the background and giving the reader enough knowledge to understand what the piece their reading is about. However, I feel as if student 2 has more of a connection to readers as everyone is part of a generation but not everyone is part of the black community. The author of essay 1 introduced the gap in the conversation in, well, the introduction and he claimed that there’s a difference in how black people separate and differentiate those in the black community. Essay 2 however claims later in their piece that generation Y is the most disliked and they’re looking for the niche as in why that’s the case. Both papers did a solid job at contributing to the conversation and they both divided their writing out into parts that each addresses the topic at hand. However, when essay 1 addressed their methods and research they did so directly as opposed of essay 2 that addressed it as their research went on.
ReplyDeleteBoth essays have well enough questions the fit into Stuart Greene’s criteria. Essay 1 wants to know what factors contribute to the discrimination within the black community to each other. Essay 2 had the open-ended question on why generation Y is so disliked by older members of other generations. However, the question essay 1 chose could have been changed from “Why do members of the black community oppress each other” to “What factors cause the black community to discriminate against themselves”.
I feel as if Essay 2 did a thorough job of describing each generation and how they felt about generation Y and why they felt that way. However, if the author actually used real people as sources that fitted into these generations they would have had a more direct primary research. They relied on news sites and other sources that told them about how the members from these generations felt, but if they interviewed people that fell into these generations they would have had a much better backed paper. Especially if they interviewed an actual member from Generation Y.
Also here’s the link for the survey Screenshot:
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1n-9L-uPMWdj7R-BcKxHIGgf2BDX19ogMqvffskM3NoY/edit?usp=sharing
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteI chose to read student papers 1 and 9. In student paper 1 “The Effects of Internalized Oppression on the Black Community”, the writer presents the conversation in the introduction by showing how scholars have analyzed internal oppression in the black community between light-skinned and dark-skinned blacks. The writer cites scholars and their take on how history of slavery and oppression has created a mental oppression in the black community set forth by themselves trying to reach a standard of “beauty and success” based around looks matching European features. The research conversation is clearly outlined through the scholars’ analysis. The gap is then stated when the writer writes “…leads me to investigate the ways the black community was affected by this kind of behavior…”, showing her entering the conversation of the internalized oppression in the black community. When contributing, the writer analyzes 8 sources of information from different scholars while also conducting interviews from 14 different light-skinned and dark-skinned blacks ranging from different communities, cultures, and socioeconomic backgrounds. The writer then compares her findings in the interviews to the scholars’ findings and sees that some clash. In student paper 9 “Disney Princess Series: More than Your Average Fairy Tales”, the writer tries to combat the gender roles imbedded into youth through the classic fairy tale stories. She first starts by opening with a broad introduction strengthened by looking at the growth of fairy tales in society, how they instilled this idea of the female and male roles, and turned to scholars’ analysis on the matter. The gap was after analyzing multiple scholars’ research, then planning to conduct research using scholar’s coding frames on relating key terms to female and male stereotypes. To contribute, the writer wrote a letter to the Orange County school district superintendent and laid out a curriculum that schools should give to their students to not only aid in teaching about the gender stereotyping in stories, but also to help them learn early about the research process. The writer then emphasizes this plan is low budget and would only reap benefits for the students and society in the future.
ReplyDeleteBoth follow Greene’s criteria for an open-ended question, and the research question in paper 1 would run along the lines of how internalized oppression is hurting the black community, while paper 9’s research question would be based around how children are hurt by gender stereotyping in fairy tales and how can that be combatted. If I were to re-write their questions, paper 1’s would be “Is internalized oppression in the black community combatable?” and paper 9’s rewritten question would be “How can schools better quell stereotyping in children’s developmental vessels?”
When analyzing paper 9, instead of writing to a superintendent with a lesson plan, perhaps the writer could’ve been more “hands on” and used interviews with children and teens themselves to see how they personally feel about gender roles. This would show what the majority believe from a young age and if they learn to distinguish stereotyping later in their development.
Survey Screenshot Link:
https://drive.google.com/file/d/0BzySLpdY5yuhdmJJcjZ0SWh2X00/view?usp=sharing
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteSurvey Screenshot Link
ReplyDeletehttps://docs.google.com/document/d/1Qa2SK_ktF7xW15PZOyL-m2WwpsnL3k-eD8C_0y5QAQQ/edit
In both student paper one and two the authors present a research conversation by using other sources such as articles and people. By do so they were able to use the information they received to make their own analysis and discussion. The authors were able to show their understanding of the topics which they addressed by giving personal experiences and examples. The authors were able to conduct their own researched and make their analysis based on their results.
The research question posed in the first student paper is to figure out how similar the rhetoric youth is across five generations. The second paper research question is focused on the internalized oppression and what it has done to the black community. Both research questions meet the criteria of Stuart Greene’s criteria of open ended questions. The questions can be answered with tools that they can access, the audience to which their questions pertain to are identifiable, and the questions address an issue. If I were to re-frame the questions I would state the first question saying, the rhetoric between the youth and the five generations. For the second I, would say, the ways in which the past affect the way blacks were perceived and what others perceive about the black community.
If I were to conduct my own primary research to address the question. I would start off my research by reading and analyzing other sources such as articles, books, and webpages. I would then use the information I gained from those sources to create a survey. I would then post my survey online and in all my social media accounts. Based on the results I received from my survey I will analyze my results and come up with my own conclusion while using the other sources I previously used for comparison. The survey questions will be more personally to how the individual feels about the statement and if they ever had to deal with some of the situations that many of things that the black community had to deal with in the past or if they are still dealing with those issues.
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeletehttps://docs.google.com/document/d/1VhmPQSPVhnVjb13WL9ClmYFhSDYWc3yejfq8Hf4eTEM/edit
ReplyDeleteI chose to read student essays two and five because when I was looking at all the titles those were to two that caught my interest and made me want to read it. In student essay two, the introduction includes the way some generations are viewed and that one is viewed worse than the other. In student essay five, a question is presented on “What works in the recruiting process?”. A small handful of players on a college football team are interviewed to see what was the deciding factor that made them attend that school and what things the recruiters did that sold them to going there. The gap in paper two is talking about why Generation Y seems to get more dislike from elders. In every interview, they are being called narcissistic, irresponsible, and rude. As for the gap in paper five, it is stated that there actually hasn’t been much research on the recruiting process. There wasn’t a lot of background information that they were going to get to work with when conducting that experiment.
I don’t believe essay two met the standards of Greene’s framework. It does not answer why exactly the generation is picked on so much but it does explain what reasons they are disliked more. The new question could be “What reasoning’s contribute to the fact that Generation Y seems to be disliked or picked on more compare to others?”. I do believe paper five met the standards of Greene’s framework. The question posed was “What works in the recruiting process?” and an answer was found at the end of the experiment, building a personal relationship with the player. There was valid evidence because a small survey and interview of players that were recruited to play was taken. It is also clearly stated that the question is being asked and answered for college football fans and coaches. In essay two, she could have gotten personal stories from people she interviewed and even could have interviewed people of another age to see what it was like for them growing up to find any differences between the generations as an alternative for primary research. I don’t think there should be any alternative primary research for paper five.
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteSurvey Screenshot Link
ReplyDeletehttps://drive.google.com/file/d/0B9zJtLQ_h7aBMWJlOUFlZUR3Mms/view?usp=sharing
For my reading, I chose Student Paper 1 and Student Paper 8. Both papers were great in presenting a research conversation. Paper 1 researched internalized oppression within the black community. The student clearly states the gap in the introduction, where color discrimination is not only against white people and black people, but also between black people themselves. They give a lot of background information by referring to slave history. I don’t think they contribute too much to the conversation, instead they use more citation. Student paper 8, also presents their research conversation well. They begin by providing a lot of LGBTQ community history, which leads to their contribution into the conversation of how they think things have changed with how the LGBTQ community has been treated over the years. Paper 8 also indicates a gap in its introduction.
Considering Greene’s criteria, both papers succeed in developing an open-ended question. Paper 1 questions the factors that contribute to the oppression within black communities, while Paper 8 questions the factors that have affected the support to the LGBTQ community over the years.
An alternate means of primary research to address the question to Paper 1 could be to conduct a survey, or reach out to an older population not just the younger generation in the black community
Survey Link : https://drive.google.com/open?id=1P9uSDyP0v6ibnNqpTFiBer2eJk4-xa-K1AQ4XRORQ7jI4FKF5EYa4Qg7tD4oG-e9mOGXDwAwZ45Q1BTb
ReplyDeleteThe two student papers that I chose to analyze are papers 1 and 3. Paper 1 focused on the internalized oppression of the black community. The author of this paper presented adequate research about this topic to establish credibility to their argument. Although the gap they would explore was not explicitly stated in the introduction it became clear later in the paper. Their contributions to the conversation were shown through the interviews conducted and the conclusion that was reached. The third paper focused on the disinhibition of reddit users. The author set the framework by showing research already done on the topic and what it showed. Paper 3 did not really have a specific gap but explained that the goal was to gather greater information in the area, specifically on reddit. The contributions of this paper to the conversation focused on more explanations for these behaviors.
Both papers do a good job of meeting Greene’s criteria. Both authors provided ample prior research on the topic and examples from other works. They also found their gap and provided new information in the conversation. Paper one’s question could be reworded to focus on how using their research these problems could be eliminated. The question of paper three could be changed to focus on the effects that this disinhibition has on the community.
An alternate means of primary research for paper three could have focused on in person interviews. The research done by the author focuses mainly on analyzing comments and other threads posted on the site. If the author had found users of the site and interviewed them and asked for their opinion on how or why they may behave differently on the site than in real life.
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteI tried to screenshot it, but it won’t let me post any of my photos, so here is the link, https://www.surveymonkey.com/survey-taken/?sm=vyrxDCeFlVixus_2BIajON7eWy8ui3v7CGiM_2F328UJor6_2F3uSfLUmRdVXOGASZQ0oraAd8ZWh7f_2FVwZBHeHpcGxA_3D_3D
ReplyDeleteTo begin with, I chose student papers 4 & 9 to read. I think that both student papers were very intriguing and was written really well. I thought that student paper 9, was way more fluent and more descriptive about the research topic. Paper 9 was about Disney princesses, and talk about gender inequality in the Disney movies. The writer gave an example of how to teach students in Orange County about stereotyping and set out and outline of lesson plans that a teacher could teach her 5th or 6th grade. Although, I thought paper 4 still well thought out, I thought it was missing some key information. Student paper 4 was about combatting internet piracy and what the cost would to internet users. Each paper indicated a gap, in student paper 9, the gap was when they talked about the life coding chart on the keys of male and female stereotypes. In student paper 4, it talked about ACTA went through without being shut down and unnoticed, but with higher costs, restricting internet users. Each paper really contributed to the conversation, by giving facts from other papers and researchers.
Both papers had a research question that mostly met Greene’s criteria, for the framework on a good question. Paper fours research question was “If the cost is too great for combating internet piracy?” On the other hand, paper nines research question was, “Are the Disney Princess Movies more than your average fairytale?” They both provide answers to the questions from researching various authors and studying the topic for awhile. Although, I think paper 9, hit more of greens criteria, more than paper 4 did throughout all the whole paper.
For student paper 9, I would’ve interviewed children and how their thoughts were on the Disney Princess movies, this would be a good fit as a primary research. The author could’ve conducted a survey talking about the research of the top 3 stereotypes for each gender and see how they felt that way, or to see if they even know what a stereotype is.
I chose student papers 6 and 9 to read and analyze. To begin with Student Paper 6, “Video Games and the Hero’s Journey”, the writer wrote about how video games are more than just a way to pass time but are beneficial and are emerging mediums for narratives. In Student Paper 9, “Disney Princess Series: More than Your Average Fairy Tales”, the writer wrote about the influence that children’s literature has on gender roles throughout the children’s’ youth and how research needs to be done throughout daily lives rather than just in courses (Richard Larson). Both papers were able to present a research conversation the writers were able to go into more detail with. It was easy to realize that the writers both choices topics that they were very interested in. In Student Paper 9, the writer analyzed five Disney Princes Collection books (Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs, Beauty and the Beast, The Little Mermaid, Sleeping Beauty, and Cinderella) and “extracted” information on the different gender behaviors of both genders and different words to describe both genders. In addition to attaining this information, the writer referred to Frank Taylor’s Coding Frame for a basis of how the genders appeared to be like throughout the books. The writer used tables and graphs for the gender stereotypes to display this information which gave readers a simple and understandable way to view the data and the results. Although in Student Paper 6, the writer did not seem to do as good of a job stating the ways in which how he received the information on the narrative quality on the video games that he choose (The Last of Us and Beyond Two Soles).
ReplyDeleteBoth papers indicated a gap in their introduction, telling what their topic of conversation would be. In Student Paper 6, the writer’s gap stated that although videos games have been socially portrayed as a waste of time and childish, there has been research that claims the video games are beneficial and can provide to be an effective narrative medium. In Student Paper 9, the writer’s gap stated that children’s books have an influence on children on the topic of gender roles. This is because they grow up learning what they read in books and believe what is displayed in them is what is always right.
Both papers did a good job explaining their side of the story and it seemed easy to understand that they chose topics they loved through this section. They both contributed to their conversation by both stating their side and the argumentative side of the topic.
Student Papers 6 and 9 both followed Green’s criteria in a good manner. Both papers did a good job identifying the issue (Student Paper 6: video games are not just ways to pass time , Student Paper 9: children’s books are influencing children on specific gender roles.) Both Students also did a good job identifying the situation through the data collection and research through other studies. Student Paper 9 although did a better job than Student Paper 6 though when having to frame a good question. Student Paper 9 in the title alone states information that can be a question alone “More than Your Average Fairy Tales”? This brings curiosity into play and furthers enhances the readers want to read more. Student Paper 6 does not state a question well that describes his paper for further discussion.
For primary research, for Student Paper 9 I would go out and get opinions from other people in person on what they think the gender role in the children’s books appear to be. For Student Paper 6 a way for primary research would to once again ask other opinions on weather or not the video game is a narrative medium and can benefit others from reading it.
Survey
https://www.surveymonkey.com/survey-thanks/?sm=LrmblKPQ_2FLq3cJawAWhL5KvM9Fs05GPz0jhwnQmn4I78_2BbHuDTOvZmKTFdklOOgpf9_2BMB0Z1SG8wU8aM24i86R2_2Bbwrorkhvcblr_2BrTTfpKm_2FtiMPf1bZw6pKOGRqnp1MHBA6EbU4vTgTXIuwk1VnyATpZo3uBfd7pgA8e9kEibovwxQZWqj6I1_2Bl54ej0q6
SurveyMonkey: https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/5MRSJD5
ReplyDeleteI have decided to choose student papers 4 and 6 as were indicative of well-crafted and organized compositions, despite their contrasting approaches and styles in conveying their research and perspectives. Both written works successfully introduced a broad sense of direction in their conducted research, providing leeway into understanding and bringing into mind the specific question the authors prepare to answer. Hartig, in “Combating Internet Piracy: Is the Cost Too Great?”, organized a research conversation providing both sides of the anti-privacy legislation, those who support such as of means to combat privacy and those who are against as it infringes upon their freedoms as internet users. Plyler, on the other hand, initiated his research conversation with an imposed question, and proceeds to write in support of his issue by explicating in detail how video games can be an effective narrative medium. Moreover, both papers allowed a gap into their respective researches. Paper 4 described the SOPA and PIPA legislation’s shortcomings in combating privacy as they faced scrutiny. Paper 6 described how particular video games like The Last of Us, have a compelling narrative that parallels one in the mediums of book or on screen. Hartig has not asserted a role in contributing to the conversation himself, however, Plyler has conducted a textual analysis in regards to his issue.
Both papers followed Greene’s criteria. The question in paper 4 was is there a cost in combating internet piracy and the question in paper 6, although not explicitly stated, was should video games be considered a true narrative medium. Paper 4 displays the author’s suggestion in remaining indifferent to the issue of internet piracy and letting the issue fix on its own. Paper 6 shows in many instances the story-telling potential of video games.
I suggest that the student of paper 4 should have conducted a survey or interview in seeing the varying stances and perspectives on the issue of online piracy.
Julian Arrieta
ReplyDeleteThe two student examples I selected were number one and three. The following two student examples kickoff at a very smooth and nice rhythm. With its good pace and gradually input of information it starts to create a interesting conversation. It comes to a point in which both articles become who captivating that you are forced to sit and enjoy the story being told. I call it a story because in this case it was something new for me witness so I just relaxed and read the article without the hesitation of refuting every piece of evidence. I just let the information hit me and I continued. However I do see different trends in each student article. Despite engaging at the pleasure initiation speed the articles would be organized in different formats. For example student one’s article proceeds with a history background to a more modern relevant piece of evidence. While student example number three’s is more of counter argument of a claim he recently makes in his introduction to allow for this narrow mindset barrier to be collapsed in order to see the bigger picture. The gaps in both student articles are slowly being engaged with the help of new evidence to overload this reader’s mindset to break their perspective and force them to view a new idea , which is the author’s perspective.
The main focus of open-ended questions is to deliver the questions with dialogue. The author’s goal is to create an environment on paper to seem like a conversation. They want to make you feel comfortable receiving this information so that you can interpret it. After that they want you to understand and visualize a new perspective in order to see theirs. These open-ended questions may not have direct answer and are suppose to controversial. This allows for there to be a connection when there are different viewpoints this starts a conversation. Your goal is to persuade them of course however before that it’s to make them see your view. When you are mature enough for this open-ended questions you include your argument and the counterargument to take your claim stronger because you have seen theirs. If I were to reframe student one’s question I would have made it “Is intra-racial color discrimination really a controversial subject with black communities?” I would have made it a question that is a bit more rhetorical in order to see people’s ideas and opinions.
Student article number one’s problem is the age range. This student includes a lot of information about the history of the skin color. In order to witness and review if there is discrimination of intra-racial colors the age ranged should have been increased in order to witness a more variety of time periods to see if that affected the analysis.With a larger range of age more time and experience have shaped these individual causing for a more diverse amount of answers. By increasing the range from 17-60 years old you can gather more data and have more of a clear analysis. If you find that there are more similar patterns within this extended time period you can tell there are problems with intra-racial black communities. If there isn’t then it explores another subject. The student should run this experiment again and it might take him a bit longer however he will gain a stronger sense of the perspective within his analysis.
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDelete